kimmie nguyen:

Just a Name

'Kimmie' is not my given name. My legal name is much longer and doesn't sound sexy when murmured under one's breath. Not like 'Kimmie' is oh-so-sexy but give this a whirl in bed, 'Hello, Khanh Kim Phuong Nguyen'. While you don't need the first and last names to be strung together for it to be valid, it's considered the formal way of telling someone your name in Vietnamese. After years of teachers mis-pronouncing my name (repeat: Con Kim) and kids butchering it in ways never thought possible (hi, King Kong), my besties in junior high decided a slightly more American name was in order. And so it began with mom lecturing non-stop about how I was throwing away my roots. A small twist on a name and suddenly I was turning my back on my culture? But I loved my new, upbeat name and used it everywhere despite her disapproving glare. The funny thing is...I never actually did change my name legally. Admittedly it was first out of fear but eventually just because I wanted to keep the name that she had given me.

The other day I received a package from mom addressed to 'Ms. Kimmie Nguyen'. My immediate thought was, "Shit I'm in trouble." But it was just a care package and a quick call home confirmed that everything was fine.  As little a gesture as that was I feel like we've met somewhere in the middle on this one. So what if it took 20 years to get here, she's finally okay with calling me 'Kimmie'.

Good tidings and all that jazz...

My parents threw a Christmas party today - which they haven't done in something like ten years - and a dozen friends came over with kids and dogs in tow. I know, they have friends? Mom spent most of last night prepping food and I made a zillion eggrolls this morning. Insane. But fun and so unlike them to be this festive. 2010 must be my lucky year considering the two legit family holidays now under my belt. Maybe next year, my parents will want to celebrate with our own family rather than other people's? A girl can dream! :)

I'll be offline next week basking in the Mexican sun so wanted to wish y'all a wonderful New Year. Thanks to my dear friends for their love and support this year. I'm blessed to have each and every one of you in my life.

As you write out those New Year's resolutions about traveling more, drinking less (well, except for maybe @daisysf and @deflatermouse) and being the best that you can be, find a little inspiration in this TED Talk.  Wofford College president Ben Dunlap tells the story of Sandor Teszler, a Hungarian Holocaust survivor who taught him about passionate living and lifelong learning.

Hope this holiday season finds you happy and loved. Besos.

 

'Tis the Season for Family Tales

It's strange to come back from a visit with the parents and not have a blog update. I guess after the three month hiatus, mom missed me enough to just let me be myself at home. We even had a family dinner - albeit at someone else's house and with quail instead of turkey - but it was nice to do the traditional bit of sitting around a table partaking in conversation and food. Mom enjoyed the evening so much that she even encouraged me to a drink or two.  I thought she'd gone mad or was playing some cruel trick where I'd be yelled at later for being a raging alcoholic. But amazingly enough Thanksgiving came and went without incident. I stayed a full three days, which is record breaking considering the last few visits, and left smiling and content. Just goes to show that family in any format can be exactly what you need, that time apart can bring you closer together and change in small amounts is better than none at all.

Enjoy this week's Mommy-isms:

mom: Hunnie, you need to take tings home wit you.

me: What things? (less we forget about the year she tossed my yearbooks into the trash...)

mom: Your tings. From school hunnie, I have box and box of dem upstair.

me: Gah! Please don't toss anything out again, Mom. What things are you talking about?

[mom goes upstairs and returns with a cardboard box]

mom: Mommy don't need all dis paper, you take wit you to Berkeley.

me: Mom...these are my grade school awards and certificates. What do you mean I should take them?

mom: They YOUR tings. Mommy don't need dem, you should take wit you. You show your friend at a party or sumting. They can see how smart you are.

me: Huh? Mom, no is is going to care about these things. [rummaging through box] OMG, this is the mother's day card I gave you in the 1st grade. You can't give it back to me! I gave it to YOU.

[she laughs]

mom: Mommy don't know these tings. You want me to keep tem? Seem silly, but okay hunnie.

[more laughing]

me: YES! You're supposed to hang it on your wall or look at it from time to time and think about how cute I was. You can't give back things that I made for you mom!

[more laughing]

mom: Okay honey. Mommy keep it for you. But I ask again next year cuz house not clean wit all your tings.

 

***

me (calling home): Hi mom, did you call? What's up?

mom: Hunnie, mommy want to know...you date Canada boy?

me: What?? No. (which is totally true in the present tense) I've visited Canada a few times...

mom: Okay, dat good. They no good in Canada. I no trust dem.

me: Mommmm.. who have you been talking to and what did they tell you?

mom: I just tell you better not Canada boy. They want to get in America, try to marry you.

me: Mom, where in the world do you hear these things? Canadians can come to the states without marrying someone. So even if I were to date a Canadian, I think I'm safe from this.

mom: Okay mommy just say, you no do it. But if someone offer, make sure he rich person and give you money. Ms. Chau's daughter got marry and got tousands. So don't marry Canada for free.

mom: Er, I'm not illegally trying to get anyone into the states. And you really shouldn't be condoning that sort of behavior. And how do you...? Why? Gah, nevermind...